Stupid Little 1st Grader

My wife, Bekki, and I were enjoying a warm cup of coffee in the backyard today. We let the dogs out on their chains and sat in our beach chairs (I know how strange it must look to our little Appalachian town to actually own beach chairs). The dogs were barking at the little neighbor boys and we were yelling at the dogs. It's a vicious cycle, but I enjoy it.

Anyways, I'll get to the point. One of the neighbor boys(the little spoiled bitch one) yells out to the others that his father just brought him home a brand new bike. Well whooptyfuckindoooo. This little punk gets a new bike while the rest of the kids in the neighborhood are in their backyards playing with old chains and rocks. Bekki and I had a good laugh at our (her) observation concerning the lack of prosperity on our block. Then I got to thinking. . . I can't even afford a new bike. Not that I'm looking or anything, but shit, even if I wanted one I just don't have that kinda scratch for some shiny new Huffy. So fuck that little spoiled bitch!

It must be nice to be given things like new bikes and vaccinations and whatnot. So fuck him and his balanced diet of fruits and vegetables. I'll just stay on my side of the street and grin at him with my cavity smile and 20/80 vision. I may not have the kind of disposable income that Mr. JohnnyComeLately does, but at least I own the house I live in.
Stupid little 1st grader.

I'd like to shove that rent check down his throat and ask him how poverty tastes.