Thursday, August 7, 2008

Damn, Son. Get Off My Dick!

Here is an email that I received today, followed by my response. Enjoy

Date: Thu, 7 Aug 2008 13:03:39 -0500
From: n/a
To: Mike-Valentino@live.com
Subject: permission request

Mr Valentino:

Greetings! I am one of the few, the proud, the pervs, I suppose you'd call us , who are enjoying the fun between you and Prince Gomolvilas this week.

My somewhat innocuous, and damn near reader free blog, WileyKyote.com has a weekly feature called hot guy friday. I usually post some generic pictures I find on the net of a well-known, or relatively so, actor whom I find attractive.

This week I had a bit of inspiration. I was thinking of using you as my Hot Guy Friday subject. This, of course, would be limited to the pictures posted on both your, and Prince's websites, which Prince has told me would be fine with him. He did however suggest, and I concur, that I should acquire your permission before pursuing this idea.

Should you agree I will post the pictures attached to this email and simply recap the exchanges between you and Prince this week and let it go at that. Should you decline I'll go with someone else, obviously.

Let me know your thoughts on the subject. I understand the only balls you touch are your own, (a bit more info than I needed perhaps,) but I thought a cute real-world guy would be a nice change of pace.

Thanks
Sean Taylor

The Response

Poor unsuspecting dolt? I can't believe you have the nerve to ask my permission on anything after repeatedly referring to me as a dolt and helpless victim on your haphazard blog. This isn't gays vs. straights, alright? I think you need to leave your condescending, judgmental prejudices where they belong - heavily hidden beneath humor. You are nothing more than another faceless coward ducking behind a computer monitor. I try to live peacefully, but am far too short tempered to let some nobody step on my toes. I have nothing but the utmost respect for Prince. If he doesn't feel the same then that's fine. But, just so you know, I was the one to instigate our back and forth banter- so if anyone baited anyone, it was me.

Oh, and you can put me as your hot guy Friday if you like. I'm flattered and would gladly accept the extra traffic to my page. If, of course, anyone reads your page.

love always,
micky v.

4 comments:

Prince Gomolvilas said...

Mike (or shall I start calling you "BFF?"), I don't think Sean meant any real harm. Perhaps he has misread our posts, but you have to cut him some slack because he lives in Kansas, which is surely even more of a hellhole than North Carolina.

Also, with your increased page hits, be warned that people who DO intend you actual real harm are on their way. As you know, I deal with them on my blog on occasion.

When that happens, I will be there to defend you, BFF, and I will take down all of your detractors in a shirtless wrestling match.

XOXOX
Prince

Peter Varvel said...

BFF? Butt Fuck Friends?
(don't mind me - just jealous, here)

Mike Valentino said...

Update: I think he was offended and aside from not only scraping me as a potential "hot guy Friday", he went and deleted any reference to me in his blog. I'm not lying. The last week and a half worth of blogs from this guy are now totally void of my name. what a pussy.

ginger b said...

Well now I'm just really curious what the blog did say....